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Mosaic
Charles Hiestand
A tile, a color, a shape,
emerges figures and a story.
With distance there is sense,
yet each piece is nothing but
a tile, a line, a color, a shape
doo, doo, doo.
And so she sings
In this moment,
I am not done with respect and admiration.
And he sings
As large as the night
I hold you as my own
In this moment.
Time in proportion
makes a picture of shape, color, line and tile
doo doo doo,
and a story.
My Purpose
Charles Hiestand
My purpose is love
My soul, of me
My passion
is Her
And for mind
For mind and body
Her bright aspect
and my emptiness
are reason enough
are reason enough
And all alone
And in my loneliness
I cling to hope
She might see in me
Her destiny
Her destiny
Then set the stage
with the common things of our lives
where She plays and sings in divine light
and bewitched, I watch in rapture
How has my God
my God assembled me?
that my soul should show Her image
My love apparent in Her visage
How deep the abyss
How bright the light
(Fugue)
How deep the abyss
How bright the light
The divine light
Then set the stage for mind and heart
with the numinous objects of our lives
where She dances and sings in divine light
and bewitched, I play with joy and sorrow
My purpose is love
My soul, of me, is Her
My lover
Favorite Game
Melanie Fernandi
Time can not change
your face from fading away
Words can't explain
sleepwalk of everyday
I can't feel
our love, my tears have frozen
Take me tonight
I'll be gone before it's light
Must have seen the sadness in my eyes
Words you whispered took me by surprise
Know you didn't even know my name
You were just playing my favorite game
Pieces of me
I left with each of you
Work replaced
times of loneliness
I feel the void
closing in on me
I wish your touch
fill all the emptiness
Must have seen the sadness in my eyes
Words you whispered
Know you didn't even know my name
You were just playing my favorite game
Ah
Best of Yourself
Jean Mishler
You can taste the strawberries that don't grow on my vine
You can pick pretty flowers in a garden that ain't mine
But when you come to dinner, you better be on time
and save the best of yourself for me.
You can drive other cars that aren't parked at my curb
You can leave for three days, and I won't say a word
But keep it to yourself, don't you tell that little bird
and save the best of yourself for me.
Save the best of yourself for holdin' me tight
Save the best of yourself for the dark rainy night
for when it starts to thunder, it always feels so right
and save the best of yourself for me.
Now, I have paid a price for wanting to stay free
But this is your cost if you want to be with me
Don't ever decline when invited for tea
and save the best of yourself for me.
Save the best of yourself for holdin' me tight
Save the best of yourself for the dark rainy night
for when it starts to thunder, it always feels so right
and save the best of yourself
save the best of yourself
save the best of yourself for me.
Down From Above
Jean Mishler
She lives her life steeped in perfection
Achievements rolling off her finger tips in sweet succession.
She failed her life, empty like a paper cup
Pour in sugar, drink it up before it grows cold
You can't tell her she's unhappy,
you can't tell her she's not whole
She can never get enough success
to ever fill her soul
In desperation she seeks it all
when what she needs is love;
A cup that she could drink from
if she came down from above.
Hard on her friends, this will come as no surprise
We never were quite good enough at friendship in her eyes
Perplexed we never listened in with good and perfect clarity
centered around her life the way she thought we ought to be
You can't tell her she's unhappy,
you can't tell her she's not whole
She can never get enough success
to ever fill her soul
In desperation she seeks it all
when what she needs is love;
A cup that she could drink from
if she came down from above.
It's a harrowing discover the planets won't spin
Around you and around you at the offer of your grin
People judge and disagree, they're not captives who can't flee
The world around is not yours to command
Place oh please, place oh please
your feet upon the land.
You can't tell her she's unhappy,
you can't tell her she's not whole
She can never get enough success
to ever fill her soul
In desperation she seeks it all
when what she needs is love;
A cup that she could drink from
if she came down from above.
She lives her life steeped in perfection.
The Idea of You
Charles Hiestand
Verse 1
The idea of you terrifies me
I think of your touch night and day
Your perfect smile lights my imagination
It's no exaggeration, I'm infatuated with you
Verse 2
The idea of you leaves me awestruck
Your in my mind night and day
The warmth of your kiss in my memory leaves me
Hungry for more, I'm famished for you
Chorus
But when your near me
We are imperfect lovers
We always argue and fight
I, I am sorry
But your angry
And you leave me lonely
I think of what might have been
Verse 3
Then the idea of you floods my senses
I'm back to the fantasy of you
I pray and pray to love you someday
The way I love the idea, the idea of you.
Until
Charles Hiestand
He's luke warm,
she's as cold as ice
Did we make a mistake
when we ignored that advise?
Now many winters on
at last I am through
Standing on the other side
I can really see you
But I can't want you
I can't need you
I can't love you
It is not allowed
They say it's not allowed
My dreams were compromised
by reality
No one in the world could be
the girl I imagined
So for years I thought
this is as good as it gets
Then there you are again
my dream in the flesh
But I can't want you
I can't need you
I can't love you
It is not allowed
I hear it's not allowed
Grief is bitter
hope is worse
My heart is unprotected
a self-inflicted curse
So I'll just smile and lie
pretend and say that it's OK
You go and do what's right
but my feelings stay
And so I want
and I need
and I love
and I know
and I'll be here
until it is allowed
Bigger Than Me
Charles Hiestand
And if I lose you
I'm not a bit surprised
The time's been coming
When we'd say our last goodbyes
There is no anger
But my tears will not stop
My heart is empty
But for my love
And if you lose me
You haven't lost my love
I'm always with you
I will always be with you
There is no present
No future, just our past
I don't regret it
Only one thing that I ask
To not start again
Or heal all the pain
Not see, talk or do
Just once more be with you
I want to be with you
When I'm with you
My love is so much bigger than me
Then have I lost you?
I've lost my closest friend
I surrender to my sadness
A hurt that cannot end
There is acceptance
That my tears will not stop
My life is empty
But for my love
The world's much too small
For the sadness in my heart
It spills to the stars
Beyond my life
To every child
That's lost a friend
Or lover who has ever
Been left alone
I am alone
I, I am alone
When I'm without you
My love is so much bigger than me
So much bigger than me
For The Bliss
Jean Mishler
Digging, digging through the past in her mind
Grief abated, depths thoroughly minded
Releasing the sadness itself a bitter bind
For loss implies a former joy with pain is intertwined
To forge the sweetness from the pain
when memory's at risk
To wash away the wrenching loss
and save the sweetest kiss.
To forgive capricious destiny
with gratitude for the bliss
with gratitude, with gratitude for the bliss
Longing, longing for him so profound
Her feet no longer knowing the feel of the ground
Her youth no friend here, a very poor guide
How could she have know that he had so much to hide?
To forge the sweetness from the pain
when memory's at risk
To wash away the wrenching loss
and save the sweetest kiss.
To forgive capricious destiny
with gratitude for the bliss
with gratitude, with gratitude for the bliss
Seeming, seeming not so long ago, memories fresh
Yellow roses whispers in her ears, her trembling flesh
His burden, now know, was to easily dismissed
Ignoring children and a ring for the power of his kiss
To forge the sweetness from the pain
when memory's at risk
To wash away the wrenching loss
and save the sweetest kiss.
To forgive capricious destiny
with gratitude for the bliss
with gratitude, with gratitude for the bliss
Memory, memory in time is much more kind
He was really right to have left her behind.
Alexandria
G.P. Cavafy
Translated by G. Valassopoulo (poem is public domain)
When at the hour of midnight
An invisible choir is suddenly heard
Passing with exquisite music, with voices
Do not lament you fortune
That at last subsides
You life's work that has failed,
You dreams that have proved illusions
But like a man prepared
Like a brave man
Bid farewell to her to
Alexandria, who is departing
Above all do not delude yourself
Do not say that it is a dream
That you ear was mistaken
Do not condescend to such empty hopes
Like a man for long prepared
Like a brave man
Like to the man who was worthy of such a city
Go to the window
And listen with emotion
Ah! Supreme rapture
Listen to the notes,
to the exquisite instruments
of the mystic choir
And bid farewell to her, to
Alexandria, Alexandria
whom you are losing
Beyond
Charles Hiestand
Beyond my dreams
beyond my fears
beyond my heart
I remember you
Transcending sense
transcending hope
Beyond despair
I remember you
Your smile, your touch
your, your laughter
Oh, I smell the night and taste the time,
the short time that was ours
Beyond our pain and all that is lost
beyond forgiveness itself
I remember you
published by Phinney Farm Publishing, ASCAP